Heard In The Hall
Have you ever wondered what people talk about when they see MarriageAbility? If you were a little mouse hiding under our table at recent events, here are some of the comments you’d hear.
“MarriageAbility? Are you going to help me find my next husband?”
“Marriage—I tried that three times. It’s not for me.”
“Tell me what this is about. My wife and I have been married 62 years.”
“My daughter lives in a supported shared living arrangement. She is only in her mid 20’s. She and a 70 year old man who lives there go out as boyfriend – girlfriend. I’ve talked with staff and it’s in name only, there is nothing else going on between them. I was out of state recently and her staff called and said my daughter was back now but they wanted to let me know she had eloped. I told them I was heading home now and when I got there my daughter was going to be a widow! Then they told me they meant she ran away when she eloped, not that she eloped to be married. Phew! That was a close call.”
“My daughter asked me to go to your session and take copious notes. She has CP and no cognitive challenges. She and her boyfriend are trying to figure out if they could get married. I’ll ask if she’ll read the book with me. If she will, I’ll buy it.”
“I am so glad you did this. There are not enough resources out there about marriage and disability.”
“Does this address the marriage penalty of social security? What are options around that?”
“I’ve been married 25 years and sometimes still wonder if I made a mistake.”
“My eleven-year daughter who used a wheelchair asked me, ‘Mom, when I get married how will he carry me over the threshold?”
“I need this book now! Actually, I needed it this last week. Please email me, I want to connect you with the Wounded Warrior Project, more of our families need this”
“Do you address brain injury in this book?”
Do you know of anything written more simply for people with limited understanding?”
Said with a twinkle in his eye, and smirk on his face, “Why would anyone think that a having a child with a disability would have any kind of impact on marriage?”
“This is fabulous. I am so tired of hearing service providers tell families, ‘If you divorce you can get more services.’ That is just so wrong. We need to help families and keep them together, not tear them apart. It’s simple math; two can do more than one!”
The conversations these comments start are nothing we could plan. They are one of the many ways God uses us to plant seeds, and grow strong families affected by disability for His Kingdom.